sighx. i told her to? as in, i told her to go? cuz like everyone at home is telling her not to? but.. i dont know. i know she wants to? but its just that what everyone is saying was kinda affecting her? so i told her to go? sighx. i dont know exactly how much i said really affected her decision? but ya.. if i had continued with my stand of not going, would her decision have been different? i kinda wanna tell emi jie.. as in, bout how im feeling now? but i dont dare? does she know i was the one who told her to go? i dunno.. would she be unhappy or something? i dont know. sighx. i know jujie wants to go? just that she was unsure bout stuffx cuz everyone seemed to be telling her not to? i really just hope that she understands that when i told her to go? its not that i mean that i dont love her or something? just that.. i dunno.. i want her to do something she wants? i really dont want her to regret a few years down? i mean, if she regrets going as she's unhappy there? i'l still be here for her? 'tho far apart.. but i will be? but if she's gonna regret cuz she didn go? there'd be nothing i could do for her? i dunno. sighx. i really wish i could tell her too? but.. wouldn that just make things just harder for all of us? i dont know. i know she's not that close.. but she really has been much more tolerant, more understanding of everything now? i suppose its cuz she too knows that she's gonna go soon or something. an seriously, its really much easier like that now? but.. i dont know what im saying.. but.. sighx. i have to let her go. i know. letting go aint easy.. but its just something everyone has to do when the time comes? sighx. but i really dont wanna....